By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
my little brother just told me that I should start chasing my vodka with slim fast. genious.
she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
Eh, not fuck buddies. I prefer sexercise partner.
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
So I peed on what I thought was a wall while in nashville come to find out while running from the cop it was just a dark tinted window and the while bar witnessed me peeing
Hypothetically going to the gym on coke was a good idea
No...this little piggys going to the bar
I'm like 87% sure some random guy starting biting my ear after grinding me for like 30 seconds... I feel suprisingly unconcerned
Sorry for pissing on y'all's floor last night
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
Welp, just took a tab of acid and cracked one of three bottles of champagne... Mondays ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯
They kept freaking out that you were missing and potentially having sex.. like it was a bad thing. Got fed up with hearing it so i just yelled "ITS HER BIRTHDAY AND SHE CAN FUCK IF SHE WANTS TO!" They gave me unnecessary looks. I thought it was acceptable.
I'm at the gym. I've taken enough caffeine to feel inspired to be a low budget instagram fitness model. I totally forgot my push up bra though
Dude. why do I feel like I am cheating on you every time I do shrooms?
Randomize
