I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
I just saw the host of Singled Out do standup. Holy shit 1995.
It's amazing how much better one feels once you put something in your vagina.
I want Paula Dean to narrate shark week next year
He leaned out the window to puke right as the fan for the ac turned on. All of it blew back up into his face.
Explain to me how "cheap asian titties" is a complement?
You told him that your vagina was the "King Crab" of all vagina's.
i'm sad. The beetle crawled away. I was only trying to get him stoned.
i like feelif swiord YOU ARE A GOD
My bed smells like stale sex...I want it to smell like fresh sex, I miss you.
And don't worry, my exact words were "I can't believe a baby came outta that thing"
I've had balls on my face twice in last 48 hours and I STILL haven't got laid!
After we banged he volunteered to ducksit while I went to work. I think that's true love.
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
you know my pussy doesn't know between good and evil
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