is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
You are colorful like whore, yet adorable, like sad puppy. You need more drink.
Sorority life is like alcoholic girl scouts, plus douchebags in polos.
THAT FUCKER WASTED TWO OF MY COLORED CONDOMS! HE DIDN'T EVEN FUCKING FINISH IN IT HE JUST SLAPPED IT ON AND WASTED IT!
Sex should always be followed by Chinese food in bed.
Dude walks in wearing jean shorts and a graphic tshirt and goes home with an attractive female. EXPLAIN YOURSELF UNIVERSE.
True love: he brought me a margarita while was in the shower. He's a keeper.
I am going to go Miley Cyrus crazy if I don't get sex soon
Headline in the alligator: young zeta goes berserk after lack of sex and is found naked swinging from wrecking ball on university ave, refuses to get down until sex partner is found
I just bought a bottle of lube for my car.
In two separate occurrences, I could have avoided getting my heart broken, and chlamydia, all with a left swipe.
she used her teeth again, but this time it was out of love
Fire trucks are here again. It wasn't me this time.
You poured a bottle of water into the salad bowl and said "bowls are a joke" and then poured it into your lap.
She thought I was dancing but I just couldn't catch my balance for 11 blocks.
Having sex with him is like yoga. I do it in the morning and then can't walk for three days afterwards.
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