Just think, the more you drink, the more options you'll have of people you want to hook up with.
the only time it's appropriate to sing In The Air Tonight by Phils Collins is while sake bombing at Cal Beach
um or while having sex on a train
I just watered my plants with apple juice. Look what you made me do.
Two hours into move in day and the ambulance is here already.
The guy in front of me got in the club with his green card, that's awesome
Its 6am and I'm sitting on the couch watching Clifford. Crying into my risotto because emily elizabeth helped the girl in the wheelchair get over her stagefright so she can win a trophy. Never drinking alone again.
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
I think we can all agree that the size of her boobs, combined with beer, is destroying my ability to judge looks.
What I do when I'm blackout drunk is none of my business.
I bet Billy Ray Cyrus wishes he had pulled out now....
Well that's what you get for messing around with her vagina. I told you it was a fickle and insatiable creature.
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
Just scratched my head and I basically rained glitter.
I'll screw just about anything, but I draw the line there
Pooping in a box is not fun. You're not a cat.
Randomize
