is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
just wanted to thank u for shitting in my dads bidet last night. i had to manually scoop ur shit out of it. btw ur dumped.
Most fantastic sex ever until her Doberman took an interest in what we were doing. There was nothing more terrifying then feeling warm dog breath on my ballsack.
Just made hot dog dorito pasta. It happened.
She just ended a sentence with "and he doesn't even mind my herpes..."
If I had to give her an idea on what it means to be ur date I would compare it to being Ralph macchio's gf in the first karate kid... That's one of the coolest things I've ever said... I love drugs.
Pretty sure the girl next to me in Chipotle just came out to her mom.
We hotboxed his closet and accidentally lit some of his shirts on fire... do we have a fire extinguisher?
I punched some guy in the face for being an asshole then later I went to say sorry and give him a hug and he started making out with me. How was your new years?
I just ran into the woods like an idiot because ADVENTURE.
Ok sry I left that ambiguous......did you want contact solution or fellatio?
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
Oh man I knew I took that Molly too soon, talkin to some Scottish people lol but don’t like rollin in pizza restaurants.
She could hold her breath for a long time. Best underwater blowjob ever.
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