wakey wakey hands off snakey
Just think, the more you drink, the more options you'll have of people you want to hook up with.
can we please take bets on how much therapy you'll need in the future?
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
I'm pretty sure this is how polyamorous relationships begin.
Just had lapdance from stripper that had her 5th kid 28 hours earlier. A for work ethic.
Swear to god, if I have to wingman for you on my honeymoon I'm gonna be pissed
I'm in Burlington Coat Factory. This place'd be great if you were on E. There're so many textures...
I'm kinda hoping that if I rub the right object, a genie will come out
My dick can't jump between your dick and her mouth, man. It's impossible, I think.
He got an erection from helping me mobilize my lumbar spine. I love physical therapy school.
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
She rode me like a jockey on that tiny couch. Then we spooned.
Is it okay to get drunk at a baby shower? ....asking for a friend
She was hammered and showed her gay best mate a pic of my cock, his response was "I fucked the wrong brother"
On a side note apparently my brother is gay
You kept crying and I couldnt help but laugh at you, I was really high though.
Randomize
