Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
Here's an idea...how about I take shots by myself and drunk dial you around noon?
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
I have no idea how I got home or why I am naked but I assume I owe you a thank you...
Apparently he took me home and I pulled up my senior pictures on fbook and made him guess what I was thinking during each different pose.
My eyes feel like they're throwing up and I am the only human on campus
It feels like New Years Day all over again...me trying desperately not to throw up in the backseat & mom and dad blissfully unaware in the front
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
He's hitting it raw. Might as well stick his dick in a vat of SARS at this point.
Do they make liter beers?
They make 40s
Do they make 2 liter beers
They make 2 40s
His cat watched us the ENTIRE time. Every time I glanced over the poor kitty looked at me as if I were pelvic thrusting her father to death.
I've come to the conclusion that my issue is I'm not fucking a guy with a headboard
She keeps comparing me to her favorite dildo and I don’t know if I’m flattered or creeped out
Randomize
