if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
My balls are so social today.
The movie was so bad she gave me two blowjobs. Two.
getting a black eye the first day of spring break really sets the tone for the rest of the week.
True life. I have to get a nose job due to a deviated septum from blowing coke. Thank you college.
The important thing is not that we avoid making mistakes, but that we avoid learning from them.
Just took last nights make up off with a sock. That hungover.
I feel a whole lot better than i did this morning at 3 when one of my roommates discovered me slightly aware of my surroundings and naked in the bath tub with the shower on
maby next time we don't finish the whole box wine just because it tastes like shit
Today marks the 365th consecutive day of jerkin it. I couldn't have done it without you guys. #onlynewyearsresolutionaccomplished
do you want to shower with me?
only if we can drink the jungle juice while we shower
The George Foreman grill is melted. I don't know what other problems could arise.
I tried to prevent a bar fight. By convincing a guy whacked out on Molly to slap the ass of everyone who was arguing and shout "WOO" each time. I'm proud, surprised, and intrigued that it calmed everyone down so quickly...
He said he was a banker. Then he told me he made 15 an hour. I said he was a shitty banker then fucked his friend.
I don't know how to reply to him. 'I'm glad the ecstasy my friend tricked you into taking wore off'...? It just doesn't seem sincere
i know were having a "heart to heart" right now, but does it make you feel uncomfortable that im sexting someone right now?
Randomize
