Rosebud was a fucking sled. Gay.
i might have gotten away with it if "don't tase me bro!" wasn't the first thing i said when i rolled down my window.
There's nothing like puking in the airport on the way TO Vegas. Something tells me i pregamed a little too hard.
she said she was gay. i said prove it. she said "ok i wont fuck you"
He had a cowboy hat I don't know where from and he was trying to lasso a snowman with a dog leash.
Just painted my nails at the bar... I may be getting too comfortable here.
Tidal wave of highness just hit. Find shelter and catnip. gloves. zebra striped car washes.
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
We could be the people that go there! Shuffleboard n shit. Meet strippers.
You had me at shuffleboard and strippers
Why is everyone else growing up when I'm just crying, eating, and having pregnancy scares?
Still losing my voice, so I am trying to get it back through drugs. Welcome to my Monday logic.
Thanks be to the Goddess of Whores!! I straightened my bed before Ken got here. Found Calvin's boxers in the sheets!!!!
I wore Yonce braids out last night and made out with a man and a woman #bowdown is right
Woke up with a $100 bill from the Philippines in my bra & an unopened box of sour patch kids next to me. I have some questions.
I just realized u compared me to a coconut
Randomize
