i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
Literally just as i started to cum the church bells next ot my house began to ring. either it was the most epic timing ever or god was watching and congratulating me
He said "I know I'm not gay. I fucked a guy once and didn't like it"
I smoked weed with pregnant girl. I'm going to hell.
Two man bar crawl was hectic. Just found leaves in my pocket.
Daquari drive throughs 24 hours a day. LORD HAVE MERCY
I'm not mad at you for letting me use my air mattress as a toilet, i'm mad at you for letting me lay back down on it.
im actually so stoned and hungover i feel like a bag of jello stuffed into a human shape
That bottle of wine took a part of my soul with it.
Ahh, 151. Think of it this way: it took one shot to get you buzzed, I took eight. I may or may not have broken a tv with my skull that night and met someone's parents naked and hungover the next morning.
Did we seriously just get into a fist fight over kit kats?
Holy fuck where did this cat tattoo on my ass come from
I'll meet you in hell with unlimited boxes of wine though
Guess who just hooked up with a guy who was wearing a shirt from his mom's "dress up closet"?!
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
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