I've slept with so many tools that you'd think my pussy was Home Depot.
I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
There is an empty space on my boobs where glow paint should be.
Those two lesbians inspired me. A whole new way to roll. Fuck shots. Gallons of vodka is the new tequila.
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
Bro... You handed me an ice cube from your drink and said "tell me if it tastes like pickles".
He got kicked out 3 times. I have no idea how he kept getting back in. I saw him walking on the highway the next morning.
Dude it was bad... like you fell asleep around the toilet after drinking from the back tank bad.
I will kick you in all of your body parts. All at once.
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
Good god, my descendants are going to be fucked.
You know, this is NOT how I pictured my life would be when I was younger, and yet here we are.
you were so high you just watched the elf.... its spring
He was all “please don’t bail because I’m missing work for this” last night
Honey no, I need dick. I’m not going to bail
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