I don't know what's more sad: The fact that he fingered the side of my leg, or the fact that the side of my leg feels like a vagina.
turn left when you see the girl thats puking on the sidewalk. she hasnt been moving much so she makes a good street marker
All I remember is yelling RUN as fireworks started going off in the kitchen. Who said that was a bad idea?
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
Wash that dress asap. You laid down on the kitchen floor and tried to sweep the floor with your body.
Just helped a homeless man panhandle outside of Wawa, made him $6.31. Where are you?
passed out in the hallway last night, now I'm sitting down in the shower, eating lukewarm canned soup out of Tupperware, listening to Carly rae jepsen.. I had a rough night.
I don't know if I'm more excited about sex or that I have an excuse to smoke a cigarette
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
Things he's good at: oral sex and geometry. Things he's not good at: actual sex.
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
Just ignore the penis. It's won't bother you. I promise.
Gave a guy a blowjob in a convent. Place in hell is now secured...
I just had a legitimate orgy. Wearing glowsticks.
He’s going to a lawnmower race. I got a Brazilian and he’s racing a lawnmower race. Pick me up. I’m not wasting this waxing on John Deer
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