Here's my recipe for happiness. Go get a pen. 1. smoke a bowl 2. put on explosions in the sky 3. take a bath. Do this for about 1 hour or until all your problems go away.
I just went in my fridge and said to my turkey "see you thursday". I seriously have issues
just chased whiskey with a pickle. i definitely recommend it
I just used an app to identify a song that was playing in the background of a porno. May god bless your soul steve jobs.
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
Aw c'mon. You have to see if the spinning penis rumor is true.
90% sure you snuck in there somewhere, all I really remember is big boobs in my face so I'm assuming it was you.
He must have sensed I was about to trade him in...he's really stepped up his sex game
just woke up in a camero on the way to nebraska, i would appreciate it if you answered your phone.
As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
THINK! exactly how many raw eggs did you color and hide in my apt.
I can't decide if this outfit makes me look like a pirate. I also can't decide if I care if it does.
He told me that he's proud of our abnormalcy as a couple. I think it's the most romantic thing he's ever said.
He makes bad life choices and drives a wagon, how is that not my type?
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
Randomize
