I need help removing her.
Be careful down there, Shane may have pooped on the carpet.
:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
walking in back of a girl wearing booty shorts, a halter and a bracelet that says trainwreck. I don't get it. The first day of nice weather and all the whores come out, are they like hibernating bears or something?
went for icecream. accidentally deepthroated it. my mom gave me a dirty look, but the kid behind the counter looked impressed
He tricked me into going on a double date with him, I don't like that he's not using me for just sex anymore
I think it says something about my life when I start picking up girls while im in rehab. And I don't think it's good.
He must have sensed I was about to trade him in...he's really stepped up his sex game
I don't hate him I just hate being present to see him consume 80 dollars worth of alcohol and then try to tip people with left over money on a Walmart gift card
You were making out with a freshman and said you wanted to back to his place. Then when you got to the door to leave you said "never mind." He sad it wasn't fair and you got all serious and told him "welcome to the real world kid."
Oh god now he thinks I'm into him because I've been staring at him trying to figure out what animal he looked like
Is it bad that I have more guilt over drunk eating Doritos than hooking up with my ex's best friend last night?
I just thought about how many drinks I had last night and threw up.
Ugh. I just found a cum stain on my mermaid pants. Now I can't return them.
i love how you, my friend, sends me a picture of herself wearing a shirt that says "i am dead inside" and i'm just like "awww baby you're so cute"
that's just solidarity
Randomize
