All drunkenness aside, confirm u are alive
after drinking 6 jumbo margaritas he then proceeded to tell the entire restaurant that he was going to "bust a load in me" when we got home....how do you think the rest of my night went?
It's been so long since i rode in a trunk. I'm riding in a trunk btw
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
I'm never drinking again. I saw way more penises than I ever cared to see last night. And I've decided that I'm going to live in Scotland.
I need an explanation for both of these epiphanies.
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
Stop sending me pictures of you naked. This violates the friend zone agreement.
Who knew I could feel anymore shameful at the bar than i usually do...I think my bartender recognizes me from the walk of shame out of his house after i hooked up with his son yesterday
Same I threw up in 3 different cities already today
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
He gives me the same feeling I get when someone puts a margarita or German chocolate cake in front of me
What're you gonna do with the rest of your night?
Probably watching cooking videos and fantasizing about pie
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
I always know im high when I can't remember how to pee.
had to remind myself that killing him is not a good career move AGAIN.
Randomize
