What a fucking waste of an outfit
At the Phils game. My gay buddy just wanted up to a bunch of Mets fans and said "I'm gay, and even I think Mets fans are a bunch of fags." I love this fuckin town.
today is like waiting for pizza day in elementary school, but with sex added
I wanna get so drunk next week I throw up on a guy's genitals. I want to be that memorable for someone.
There's a paramedic out here, what have you done?
all I heard when I woke up this morning was "BONG HITS FOR BREAKFAST" being yelled repeatedly.
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
There is nothing scarier than watching yourself breathe in the mirror while on shrooms.
Yeah I'm a responsible adult man but I legally unbind myself from anything that occurred that evening and am in no way responsible for those actions.
If you don't sing me a lullaby then I'll just take shots till I pass out
I am officially now FB friends with my arresting officer.
I told the guy that if he didn't put enough pepperoni to earn the name " pepperoni feast", that I was gonna sue him for all he had. Believe it or not, that's all I remember.
Everyone called me "Barf Vader".. And I lost your lightsaber.
At one point I was convinced he was a snake and was going to eat me And I just accepted it
Randomize
