I literally ate my thanksgiving dinner while getting a lapdance. And honestly, after that, there is no other way.
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
I knew I was high when I wanted to write a poem about how great it felt to wash my face
May have caused an international incident. More details after we taxi in.
my night ended in me puking all over jenna's bed, then me trying to wash the sheets in the toilet.
please stop judging me for buying a handle of soco on a thursday at 10am. it was on sale, i'm thinking of my future.
Can you send me the video of that girl that got arrested last night? I'm gonna try and hit that and I need something to break the ice with.
I'm lying topless with an eye infection at the foot of my bed with a dog between my legs. With disney in the background. Its one of those 3 am moments
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
She just pored wine down the turkeys hole and said that she christened it like the whore that it is...happy thanksgiving.
Is it possible to be drunk burnt? Like sun burnt but from drinking? Cus I think I that's what it feels like
Well I passed out before 4:20 on 4/20 so I deem it a failure AND a success.
Sending out old nude selfies with the message "#tbt"
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
In this house, we have but one simple rule: DONT FUCKIN TOUCH MY STUFF OR I'LL CUT YOUR NECK IN UR SLEEP
Randomize
