I'm going to use my one free fuck up card tonight.
What'd you do?
Its more like what im about to do.
then she said "on the count of three I think we should apologize to eachother"
the only good thing about these hospital visits are the free pregnancy tests
Eventually evolution will just give us a better liver anyway, so our great great grandkids should THANK us for our binge drinking.
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
this is a time for prayers...seriously
let us hold hands and pray.. sweet baby jesus please bring us some sweet sweet man loving this homecoming weekend to aid our lonely vaginas it has been a long couple of weeks amen.
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
Apparently getting a blow job in the mens room from the bar owners daughter will get you kicked out.
I mean, I introduced myself as "the after party". I think he knew early in the night he was in for a bangathon.
Adulthood is making your own puke bucket.
When i said you could use my car and have sex in the back....i wasn't being serious.
1 fuck you 2 fuck her 3 ur forgiven 4 im breaking up with her
I was told I was gorgeous and a whore by the drag queens. My night is complete.
Hmm should I take my nipple rings out before my sisters wedding/family vacation in Puerto Rico where I will be with my mother 24hrs a day for four days wearing a bathing suit seemingly the entire time? Or should I just risk it and not hug anyone.
Risk it. Keep the titties tough.
I often wonder if we’re introverted extroverts, but I don’t think so. I think we’re just easily tired scumbags
Randomize