it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
If I don't come home tonight, I've died in a pile of gay.
her name is jenna, so i wanna cunt punt her
that's how i am about ashleys and britneys
why are there beer bottles in my dishwasher?
Just realized after we're done pre-gaming for St. Patricks Day, we have March Madness, the first day of spring, and Easter to pre-game for. March is a great month.
If people don't want my drunken phone call then TAKE YOUR FUCKING NUMER OFF OF FACEBOOK, like it's just that easy...
Maybe your new years resolution should be not to fuck in Sears bathroom anymore.
Yea, I had a chaperone thankfully. I'm in the fetal position attempting to eat captain crunch now.
FUCK YOU. AH. FUCK BOTH OF US MORE BOOZE.
MAS TEQUILA.
WHY did you say no to the sex seance?
Start warming up your vocal cords, because Fucking With The Windows Open season has arrived.
I left her alone for a few minutes and she's already using a guy on his hands and knees as a chair while another guy is serving her margaritas.
Nothing like the judgmental looks you get in the bathroom when you still have last night's glowsticks on
learned the hard way that breakfast jack daniels is a lot stronger than lunch or dinner jack daniels.
They gave me 4 meds at the health center and said not to take alcohol with any of them. Guess ill wait until tomorrow to feel better.
Randomize
