Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
he just had his sister send me a message about how he's not a creeper
Was his mother too busy breastfeeding him to do it?
She just wrapped her tongue around my thumb.....lizard girl may be my next wife.
he busted in while i was showering looked at me and said "youve lost weight bro, no homo" and started puking into the sink
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
The gay bar tender told me I looked like Prince William. And that I needed my balls licked.
Sometime between a drunk guy asking me if I'm a Beach person or a lake person WHILE HIS HAND WAS IN HIS FUCKING PANTS or breaking up a lady fight over peewee football league I started to reevaluate my life and self
Holy shit, you lost your virginity on 11/11/11. Now every time someone fucks you, they can make a wish. Your vagina has officially been transformed into a wishing well.
DONT LET HIM GET NAKED. JUST SAY NO
Stealing, and booze. If only you added meaningless sex with random people you would have wrapped all your life passions together
I was having a serious heart-to-heart, and then the weed gummy kicked in.
Like he was trying to be sexy but he had shit taste in porn so i left
Dude, I need a fuckin wingman and this could finally make us eskimo brothers, how can you pass that up?
i cant go to his party cause last time i pressed the red buttons on the wall and the fire alarm went off for 40 minutes, i'm not allowed back there
That chick keeps sending eggplant emojis
Welcome to dating in the digital age. Better catch up now that you’re divorced
and eggplant is code for penis. It means she’s DTF. Go get her tiger!!!
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