and before you know it i was laying next to him at 2 in the morning with penis and sadness on my breath.
There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
all you did was keep googling "what time is it" over and over and over
So someone hacked my email and facebook and posted a boob pic I took a few years ago as my profile picture. I feel like an MTV commercial.
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
Also, you peed on your hand last night. Id just like to point that out
Taking a semester off always leads to bad things like having a baby or getting married
My new dealer was watching Space Jam and eating ham off a frisbee when I went over. He's my new favorite person
You see it tends to piss fathers off when they find their daughter in the arms of a shirtless guy that neither he nor his daughter knows.
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
If I could figure out how to do him with his wranglers on you would never see me again.
I knew how high you were when you put a french fry in your mouth and said 'fuck, this tastes like meat but feels blue.'
I don't think I can get drunk, high or horny enough to even consider that
I do very much feel like vomiting. and I have no idea where that lighter came from. thank you for coming to my TED Talk.
Randomize