Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
Can you tell me why I have pubes stuck in my teeth?
My parents showed me my IQ test from fourth grade, I'm shitting on my potential.
He started yelling "fuck the environment" then puked all over the baby trees
the majority of my texts from you are at 3 AM & consist of either "I'm drunk", "you're asian", or "bratwurst"
bailing my boss out of jail is a great way to spend memorial day
Yea. I think between making the bride puke, feeling up the maid of honor, and sleeping with a bridesmaid. I did my part.
She washed lettuce and peppers in the shower and proceeded to make a salad
I think a kid would responsible me up
Her fortune said that she will soon be free. She's taking her bra off at the table.
Would it be crossing a line if I told him that I now know his girlfriend has a huge mole on her left ass cheek?
idk i just feel really unsatisfied. like something's missing from my life... maybe it's chicken nuggets...
I dipped out before he woke up, but I made sure to take the pizza with me.
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
Pumped to get "pass out-wake up in Berlin-buy a chinchilla" drunk?
Randomize