4:25 am: I want you here. Ugh.
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
she met some random, took his vcard, peed in his bed, left, and then requested him as her boyfriend on facebook
There's half of a squirrel in the bathtub - i figured you'd be the one to go to.
You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
She climbed through the window and into my bed. Not even sure who she is. Was thinking she might be a friend of yours?
I gave him head while he watched NASCAR. My future flashed before my eyes.
there is literally a full grown man stuck between the radiator and her bed. i thought i kicked him out 20 minutes ago but nope we found him
google maps should a have a setting for this. like I AM ABANDONING EVERYTHING TO MEET A GIRL WHO IS 10 HOURS OF MILES AWAY. HOW DO WE DO THIS OPTIMALLY?
Oh, AND I met a ukulele teacher that I'd date. So there's that.
she walked up to me at the bar, kissed me, andthen declared "I HAVEN'T SEEN YOU OR YOUR PENIS SINCE 2011."
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
You are now at the point where people no longer question whether or not you might be on drugs. They now know for certain that you are
I just kept eating and watching him slide down the stairs head first
Randomize
