Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
His facebook status is an owl city song. I'm so glad i didn't end up fucking him.
Hey its bob the builder. Where did you go?
Taking shots out of pine wood derby trophiesssssss. best idea ever.
So roofie roulette was a success but I'm a little worried that the 2 who got the tainted beer still haven't contacted anyone...
I wish I could like. Pull my liver out, and put it in the corner of a boxing ring, put a towel and ice on it, rub it's shoulders, and tell it to "get back in there, you got this!".
I also was calling every child by their name "Birthcontrol" - straight people are fun
She's comparing the feel of breasts to shredded cabbage. Weirdest. Grandmother. Ever.
Cause a man that looks THAT good must have an ass that tastes like lucky charms
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
where are my pants?
in the oven.
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
I just got out of the shower and I feel like I just washed off 10 lbs of bad decisions...
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
Randomize