I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
So apparently last night I was running around columbus circle station screaming that Obama was a pussy and that "waterboarding should always be an option" lol
Worst ten minutes of my life, it's was like trying to put a marshmallow in a piggy bank....
I love you like a cupcake loves an overweight child, very similar to the mannerisms of a whole cake but personal, and minus the commitment issues, plus just the right amount of icing; not to mention the convenience of mobility, and only a smidgen of the guilt😘
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
So my dealer asked me if I wanted to join his circle because we smoked so much this summer he thinks we're dealing
We need to get stoned and watch Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 2. This has become a priority. Schedule accordingly.
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with someone crawling around my carpet for 3 hours trying to pick up spilled coke...
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with ME crawling around your carpet for 3 hours trying to save my investment.
I would not recommend douching while drunk.
I just gave them my two week notice. Now is the perfect time to fuck my boss's son
I did something very bad. More specifically, my boss.
The condoms have been found. I repeat: THE CONDOMS HAVE BEEN FOUND. he isn't a collector!!!
I'm glad that we laid to rest the suspicion that he was keeping them in a scrapbook. yayy
I want sex. When is an appropriate time post funeral to ask for something like that. Like when it gets dark out?
Once you start using "cuddles" as a code word for sex you'll never get real cuddles again
Randomize