At a place where you lie naked on a big pile of pillows and they feed you lobster. You eat it with your bare hands.
this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
I like how you refer to peeing in the car as "super cute"
So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
gettin pulled by a cop with a camera crew. gonna flee. want my 15 min of fame on cops.
I hope I don't blackout because this is awesome!
felt a little awkward waiting for my McNuggets after vomiting all over the counter
You're not invited to the wedding. They don't want you starting a "who's fucked the bride the most" contest.
She told me that when she orgasms she just lays there like that baby from teenmom. Who the fuck says that
Cops busted the party. A kid dressed as a dinosaur tried to crawl out the bathroom window but his tail got stuck. It took 3 cops to pry him out.
note: just because the casino is called bourbon street, it doesn't mean you can puke and keep walking and no one will care. chalk me up for another 86
This is why you arnt allowed in pet stores
Hope you’re getting action boo.
Definitely no. I woke up next to a bag of McDonald's.
I’M DRUNK AND EXCITED.
condom fairy costume came in handy...we were making out in my living room and he wanted it so i took a condom off the costume and we did it right there...with my tutu still on....
Randomize
