I woke up this morning with "guy in polar bear j.crew boxers" written on my stomach along with a 5 digit phone number...
Buying $100 worth of beef jerkey sounded like a terrific idea last night.
how many americans can say they have been laid before eating their first big mac?
pretty sure I offered to blow her dad. she's not speaking to me & he won't stop winking at me.
Made it home ok. Only got hit by one car.
I think I pulled my groin stumbling back from the bar. That or the hippo I woke up next to.
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
a guy just walked up to us....drank the rest of my beer....and said sorry for my loss before walking away.
Was I really yelling "girls night" at random chicks before stealing and drinking all their shots?
The ONE weekend I don't put anything up my nose, and it decides to bleed like crazy
Finally smoked with my brothers, I feel like I just won gold at the Best Older Brother Ever Olympics
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
At one point I believe I was despencing medical advice while wearing a sombrero and a hulk hand
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