Hahaha figures, hmm should I spank you? Or throw a cow at you?
you think thats bad? Today I had to pop a zit on my sack.
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
i feel like god sat there all night pointing and laughing at me
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
Just saw a motorized bathtub. I think this college thing is gonna work out.
Talking about the game in the closet with a banana wearing sunglasses.
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
What should I wear?
Uhhhhh...idk? it's a gay bar
I found something that says "i'm here to party, but not fuck guys."
You did a line of free coke with an obese Slovenian unlicensed cab driver in the toilets of the most questionable strip club in the country. New low man.
When you put it like that, I'm inclined to agree.
The creepiest man is serenading me at the bar right now. I had about a quarter of a drink left and the bartender just walked over and filled it with vodka and walked away laughing.
Awee what are you going to name your new dog?
What dog?
The Medal of Honor you banged could be at the inauguration today. You really dropped the ball on keeping up with that one.
Someone wrote "LazerSwords" on my cock last night. My erect cock. Tequila is no one's friend.
just turned another straight guy gay. Goddamn the church must hate me
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