I always wonder when I meet a guy from online if he needs a moment to mentally register and accept the size of my ass. maybe ill wear a dress.
I'm not working tomorrow. need to take advantage of the last opportunity for weeks of morning sex.
when she said she would show you her other bow, she ment she wanted you to bend her over and see the tattoo on her lower back you idiot
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
she said she likes her vagina punished
being with you and your tiny dick is punishment enough
She started acting like she was actually a deaf person...so I went along with it and acted like her interpreter. I don't think anyone bought it.
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
I lowered my expectations when he started off saying "ah missionary, my specialty"
I'll be home soonish I need 4th of July sex, it's the American thing to do.
I spent half an hour sculpting my pubes into a perfect triangle of really short hair, and the first thing he said when he saw it was "Don't you think you need a shave?"
I know it's 10:30am but Finding Dory starts in an hour, and I have four points of molly. You down?
Saw your dad at the bar last night... And again this morning when he left. Told you not to mess with me bitch.
I got so tired of my roommates fucking in the tub I took a shit in it. Surprise!
He fucks strippers and doesn’t have a life plan. Of course I’m going to regret this
I teamed up with my vagina. I compromised his morals and then she corrupted him for good. It’s been a very successful and slutty partnership
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