According to my dad, my tongue ring makes people assume I give a lot of blow jobs because, as stated by him "that's what it's for"
so we have officially lost him as of 7 hours ago.. already called campus security, the drunk tank and the hospital. figure he'll turn up eventually..
i'll start checking the bushes on campus.
This glow in the dark vibrator will get me through this power outage
Do you think he woke up this morning, looked at you, and then regretted everything?
Def just hooked up with my brother's senior prom date in his bed. Does that make me the worst brother ever?
Well that's the thing. He does want to take me out... To a strip club. I see this going down a very bad road but you know I'm going to go.
Holy crap, church bells in Cibolo just scared the hell out of me. I'm pretty sure they were yelling sinner at me.
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
I will gladly accept you into my home with open legs.
I'm trying to be sexual and you're sending me smashmouth lyrics
i just hope we're both dead or in prison at the same time
tell him if he brings over dinner you might let him see your left boob...or right, whichever you prefer. But under no circumstances do you let him see both...unless he brings a good desert...like coffee ice cream or something
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
Same way I cope with everything else. With dildos, dunkin and depeche mode
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
Randomize