do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
high people should be assigned attendants
i havent had this much fun since the last time i farted and it created a boner.
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
So roofie roulette was a success but I'm a little worried that the 2 who got the tainted beer still haven't contacted anyone...
My hair is short now so it will be easier to give you alot more blow jobs
I'm going to take this text and frame it on my mantle
He is just a personification of a vodka hangover.
Yes. Sex with questionable women, and made of potatoes.
Rick two cubicles down puked and that triggered three others puking into their trash cans as well. The janitorial staff hates it when we go drinking on a work night.
Car is still out of commission. Looks like it's Grape Nuts and scotch for dinner.
I wanna borrow his axe at this point and cut my head open just to relieve some pressure
We have been dating for 5 months. I'm friends with his sister. Yet my number in his phone is still saved as "hot bartender"
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
You think the guy at the speed wash knows he needs to scrub the vomit off the side of my car?
He knew.
Randomize
