I don't know where I am but the food in the fridge is awesome.
i had a dream last night that you and i organized a foursome. swear to god
ps i'll be in miami in early july. this text has no relation to the last one
I jacked off with the cucumber and then made that fatass a salad.
Do you know a sam ****, im at the bar right now and lookin for some dirt on her to guilt trip her in to sex
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
So, do you know where my left shoe is? I mean, we were at a few places last night, and I called them. No luck for me.
i think he saw me take a picture of his dick
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
Casually brushing the Bacardi out of my hair. It's a good time to ponder regretting everything that happened last night.
Why the fuck is he under my phone as Papi Chulo?
The little girl I'm babysitting is having a tea party, the water and chips she's passing out are doing wonders for my hangover.
I have a terrible feeling that I made out with a fraternity last night
Puked in the trash can. Took a bite of someone's breadstick and kept dancing and drinking
dude, shes trippin so bad. idk what shes on, she just told me she doesnt remember her name then proceeded to get in the shower clothed to try to "rinse off the high"
Still drunk, heading to class.
It's 3 a.m. Dude
Doesn't mean I'm not at my desk. Ill wait.
Randomize
