If facebook stalking was a job I would totally pown it
you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
he was dropping me off and i told him i had to go to the bathroom and i leaned into kiss him and he asked how i went to the bathroom with a tampon up there... he was amazed that their was a third hole...and wanted me to show him where it was
i guess i called my mom last night. she wasnt nearly as impressed with what we did in the bathroom as i was
Don't you ever say "drinking at 2" as if it's a bad thing again. I'm asking you as a friend here.
mid-sex i was thinking.. these are not the right balls slapping me
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
The cops caught them pow wowing in the teepee at the entrance of the golf course at 5 am. But were still missing someone.
Tried to dry my shoes in the oven last night.
I just peed behind the dumpster and dedicated it to you. Can i call u?
No she probably looked into my aura and saw that my penis would ruin her.
Can I get that on a shirt
First sex of the summer I'm winning 1-0
GET HOME NOW
Oh shit
Looks like he unfriended you too. I feel like we were both just handed negative pregnancy tests.
So apparently Facebook just randomly finds the girl who gave me a hard handy despite having no mutual friends...
Randomize
