So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
I would wrestle an alligator for a bj right now
If penises could fly, my ass would totally be an airport.
She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
They upped the price of Plan B! Rite-aid is going to be the reason I have illegitimate kids.
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
Jail wasn't bad. Was poppin Xanax the whole way there
So after this weekend I think I'm gonna go down on one knee and propose to my boyfriend that he give me his liver.
I woke up to find that chris drank one of my contacts.
Yeah he's good at that.
my boss just offered me his leftover salvia im not sure if it was a trick question
So none of you told me my tits were popping out of my shirt for three hours?
We told you. Repeatedly. You said you made it look good.
We almost ended up sober because of u!!
the bouncer just handed me a Starbucks bag of pound cake
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
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