don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
ive decided something. ive accepted you as being gay. but i havent accepted you as a vegetarian yet.
Been at work for four hours and just discovered the chairs in my office double as a napping surface. Most productive thing I've done all day
told weddin planner we wanted to work in ceremonial body shots before vows. she hasnt reponded yet...
He kept coming back from the bar with hotter girls and just left with two...I feel like I just witnessed something amaZing. Like meeting Jesus and finding out he has no morals either
This whole situation could've been avoided if you would've just let me open the beer
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
I'd like to say yes, but I nearly lost my shit when I assumed there was no back to my house. I am not strong enough for hallucinations.
I've given up for the day already. I just wanna eat cheesecake and hide from her.
You know what, don't say anything. You all made fun on me for saying I would fuck him junior year when he taught us algebra and six years later, HERE I AM.
Remember when we were coked out at that house and we were trying to meditate in the bathroom? Who's house were we at?
I'm still confused. So he's NOT your cousin by blood, but WAS your cousin, on two separate occasions, by marriage? Still too weird I think...
He should know he can't successfully wrestle in pudding fully clothed. Amateur.
I feel like 20 angels jizzed in my mouth. This cupcake is DELICIOUS!
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