Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
I'm taking last night back. It officially didn't happen. Tell your friends.
Are you seriously gonna shit with that life vest on?
he tried to breastfeed my turtle
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
chimney cleaner pole that expands when button is pushed then pull out. Remember that. We have to patent it.
Who are you high with right now?
I'm pretty sure I had my drunk fortune told by a gay Miss Cleo last night. At least it's advice sober me can agree with.
Do you know what the cost code is for strip clubs? I'm filling out my company expense report right now
I say I hate my boss but I find myself jerking off to him more and more with each passing day
It's 1pm, she's in the shower, I don't have the guts tell her I wasn't her blind date. Someone got stood up.
I needed to bring way more fireball to class to match this professors intensity
I just used a bag of jelly beans as an arm weight...I'm not sure what to think of myself
Randomize
