I'm putting on too much make up bc I'm stoned
so i completely puked my brains out. a lot. he held me up so i could brush my teeth. then we proceeded to hook up for the next four hours.
he's a keeper
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
When I came home you were using a glowstick to eat peanut butter from the jar.
apparently he's bringing me two things i like. he said one was him and i'm assuming the other one is his penis
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
Every shot buddy I have I end up blowing. I don't know whether this pattern is good or bad.
We're getting paid a considerable amount of money to send each other pictures of our dicks...
I found our waiter on grindr, gave him my number, and got him to send a dick pic. Still not getting laid but close enough?
He went snooping and now he's all intimidated by my super amazing box of sexy time toys.
Please stop calling it that.
i just got banned from the m&m's website for trying to get poon slayer written on my custom order
Btw. I have a sinus infection from doing cocaine in a portapotty at a Duran Duran concert. So, gimme a couple of days before y'all start the party.
Nothing says I'm doing some sketchy shit like coming out of your bedroom with your underwear inside out
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