Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
Hey when you come over to pick me up in the mornin bring a camera. This is going to be legendary. Don't knock.... They might cover up
I woke up naked by my window. blinds open. smiley face drawn on my window.
he was so drunk I had to hold him up and he started crying when he heard an ambulance siren and said "is that for me?"
then mid-sex he looked at me and said "i hope this is as good for you as it is for me" and kept going.
well what she called a "work function" most people call "doing shots with your boss while people throw napkins at you."
You tried telling the RA that girl you brought home was your mom...
Being thankful with your family is one thing. Being thankful with your friends while getting drunk and smoking bowls while eating leftovers, priceless.
He said the last thing he remembered thinking was: 'Why is this vagina spinning?' Too drunk sex is no ones friend.
She insisted we fuck to Ludacris, not how I imagined popping her lesbian cherry would be. I tried delt and I liked it.
Pitting the remainder of the bottle against my hangover. I'm expecting an all out cage match for my soul and wellbeing.
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
It's destiny.
"I feel morally obligated to vote for him since he's my drug dealers dad"
I almost just opened my door to get my pizza butt ass naked
Randomize
