I puked in a mailbox on the way back from your house.
he pissed his pants, and she still wants to hook me up with him. I try not to date guys with bladder control problems... Unless they're loaded anyway.
this will be a night to untag.
Well fuck that. I mean, I made out with my cousin once. Who gives a fuck.
She keeps telling me I can't keep feeding the dog my food. I gave half the weed brownie to the dog and half to me. I just want it to taste the greatness of cheezits like I am.
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
I actually bought food at McDonald's as an apology for what I was about to do to their bathroom.
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
turns out putting a tie on my unicorn onesie didn't make it acceptable "formal wear" and I found salsa in my cup holder
Let's celebrate that I used a condom
So i stood up out of the sunroof while he gave me oral. Car was still moving. Exactly how illegal is that?
I'm drunk still and I cried and now I'm watching Whitney Houston singing the national anthem and I'm crying more
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
Yea and there’s destruction when we’re together, mostly of our livers but W/e
Wtf did i hit my head on?
Tequila
Randomize
