What about the words "You're my personal dildo" made him say "I love you"?
She brought up feelings... her days are numbered
We started a mustache riot at white castle at 4 in the morning. Will explain in detail.
sitting in my room in a shopping cart. they couldnt get my legs out of the holes. i want breakfast.
I was desperately holding on to my sandwich while we had sex.
He's a Shit stain on my heart
It sounded like he said "don't stop" but all I could hear were his balls.
Embrace your curves. Cuz we're too poor for a coke habit.
Let's be honest I'm gonna watch murder she wrote and eat taquitos at three am
... and smoked a joint with my new landlord. I'm starting to like Germany.
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
Like do I send him a nude to ease his mind off his brother having a stroke? I'm not very good with words when it comes to consoling... I would be a terrible mother.
If you gave someone an std. would you say a muffin basket, a candy gram or an edible arrangement is a better choice to send them?
he was like tryna hang and chat and I was like dude there's an iguana in this room
i've got three words. i. was. spanked.
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