I wish my dick could take responsibilities for his own actions
right before he busted, he moaned the british are coming.
only on the fourth of july.
is there a legit reason for the weird voicemail I got at 2:14am?all I could make out was 'help me' 'two hours' and 'toilet butt'. wtf did u drink.
i had confetti in my bra
i still find it in random places like a shoe or my car. that week haunts me
Just drive me around campus, I will be able to smell their innocence.
you should break up with her....give her the gift of reality
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
I lost my bar virginty and made out with a dwarf. It was a good night
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
All my friends are going on vacations with their boyfriends while I’m over here in court trying to get a restraining order against my ex....
Also I think I set a new personal record. Definitely slept with him less than 45 minutes after meeting him. Oh god my life.
How many gummy vitamins can I eat before I die
No. I'm home alone and 100% dickless. I hate my life.
Randomize
