We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
i just deleted quailman, hot hawaiian dude, appalachian swimmer, and connecticut from my phone
Walk of Shame today included voting.
I just wanted to clarify that I am not bisexual and had no intentions of ACTUALLY penetrating my roommate with a can of bugspray.
Casually brushing the Bacardi out of my hair. It's a good time to ponder regretting everything that happened last night.
I was galloping around pretending to give birth to pbrs. I could have used a mask.
I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date.
You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
We were drunk waiting for tacos and I gave him a handy in the back of the Uber while giving the driver relationship advice. I think I'm handling the whole grad school thing alright.
What shade of lipstick clearly states, I'm only attending this wedding for the drugs and groomsmen?
Ugh... The hoe gods giveth and the hoe gods taketh away.
Eh, my puke tasted like lemonade, so not too bad
No I'm not high but I did cry for over an hour tonight because I realized that they never made a sequel to "Under the Tuscan Sun" with Diane Lane.
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
I didn't have any choice but to cuddle you. Your hair was stuck on my nipple piercing.
Randomize