Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
Her parents came home early, i had to hug her mom with a condom on...
We've only been driving for two hours and I'm already down 3 vicodin...I'm not going to survive this family vacation.
Is it bad when your hot neighbor is crying on her porch, and your 2nd thought is "maybe her boyfriend cheated on her and she'll want to fuck me for revenge sex?"
Perfectly normal.
I havnt even moved into my new place yet and there's already a county sheriffs card taped to the door with my name on it asking me to call him
I seriously just found a rose petal in my vagina.
I've been living off of popsicles and broth.
he just texted me saying he needs a place to stay for the night. pretty sure i just got booty called to my own house...
I vaguely remember having a 'grass is greener' conversation about our nipples. Dream or beautiful reality?
Beautiful, beautiful reality
I woke up in a sink... Not like curled up on top of it though. I was standing, bent over, face first. IN THE DAMN SINK.
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
You are an awesome peach made of glitter.
the next thing I knew, I was on the floor of a Tim Hortons bathroom in Canada.
Hey can you send me a pic of your breast with a peace sign in the photo? I'm trying to win a scavenger hunt contest. Thanks so much
You stocked up?
No actually didn’t get a chance. If you wouldn’t mind bringing me a brownie and a bottle of Jameson that’d be nice
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