I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
Pass out mid-funnel last night.
The doctor wrote 'condom retrieval' on my discharge paper.
mid-sex i was thinking.. these are not the right balls slapping me
Can I get a DUI with a shopping cart? I've nearly hit 2 displays and little girl...
Scored tix to flower show. Do we want to go drunk on Saturday or hungover on Sunday? Only two options.
Warning: at some point today you will probably see several pics of me 69-ing a blow up turtle show up on facebook. Just disregard them.
Side note: THE ORIGINAL LION KING IS COMING THE MOVIES AGAIN--3D STYLE. We need to find shrooms.
I need to stop smoking. I just talked to corn.
not totally sure where im at but i think i've definitely woken up on this couch before. bong on the coffee table looks familiar. should be able to find my way home
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
I just want to drink cheap wine and throw my bra at an aging singer songwriter
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
Randomize
