But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
I've been at work for less than an hour and have pooped twice already. That's what happens when you start sleeping with your roommate and don't want to use the bathroom at home anymore.
I apologize for forcing you to look at my boob when we were high. It was uncalled for
Wat the fuck dude ketchup in my bong???
He legit pounded my cooking wine, because he was to cheap to buy beer. He is so not getting any.
You need Xanax blowdarts
I honestly think she should have her own reality show called "Lowering the Bar" and it consists of a camera crew following her from Bar to bar hooking up with unsuspecting drunk attractive men.
Hey. My eyes swollen shut and I can't find my shoes. How was your night?
well i mean, we just followed them into an alien and astronaut party. there was tin foil everywhere
haha all our friends are at the carnival and I'm on stage dry humping a 40 year old
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
I just found your ripped underwear on my chandelier. Care to explain?
I put miralax in my rum/coke. Go hard or go home.
You know more about his cock specs than his childhood. Proud of you
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
Randomize
