Yours is on the dinner table...mine is in my underwear drawer.
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
My favorite part of the day is the 2 seconds of ignorance you have when you first wake up. Right before you remember where your mouth was last night.
Let's just say for some reason we thought it was okay to make a burrito smoothie.
My life has literally become a dickpocolypse. Thank you, summer, I missed you.
all nice guys are gay and all hot ones are assholes
You're fat. Stop making excuses
Went from beach to class to bar all while wearing my swimsuit as pants. Clearly I'm dressed for success.
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
She gave such good road head it was turned into side-of-the-road head for everyone's safety
Not sure if you're still doing the whole "sleeping with only one person" thing but if you're not we should sleep together when I get back in town tonight.
This is how baked we were last night. Our drinking game: We stare at each other; first one to laugh drinks.
I warned you. Don't come crying to me when your vagina refuses to forgive you for this.
I LIKE NICE BOXERS OKAY!? COMBINED WITH A GLORIOUS DICK JUST MAKES THIS EVEN BETTER. WE MOVE IN TOGETHER AND THAT PIC'S GETTIN FUCKING FRAMED.
Just used the "Buddy" Poppy flower I got from a veteran to clean my one hitter. "I'm proud to be an American"
Do you know how difficult it is to masturbate with Christmas carols stuck in your head?!
Randomize
