i had the deer in headlights look when she walked in and i was digging in her hamper
in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
she then came into the room and yelled I'M GOING TO BE A COCK BLOCK for 5 minutes
im sitting in my room wearing my power rangers shirt watching a movie about a magical dragon. Ive totally forgotten what having a sex life is like.
Passed out for 3 hrs til now to wake up naked on my bed covered with grass from drunk slip and slide I would call that success
We'll probably be arrested for having a cheetah in our apartment anyway, so I say go for it.
We had sex in front of Notre Dame Cathedral, but I lost my wallet. God giveth and God taketh away.
He was dressed as a cowboy and he was dancing with my ex roommate. So I took his gun and pistol whipped him with it..then somehow we still slept together..
We have a nice shopping list..vibrators and roller blades
Priorities
This time last year, you were undressing me from my gecko costume and getting freaky in a public bathroom. Tough to top that New Years Eve.
Thank god he came over. I had to have some good sex to makeup for all the bad sex I've been having.
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
I can no longer play with you. I puked on my feet in the shower. I'm too old for this.
The stripper started talking about murdering people....that lapdance turned dark.....
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
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