GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
her last google searches are 'cheap african safari' and 'what does lion taste like'
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
I just got a Community College debit card in the mail. My failure has been materialized.
not to mention it took an hour of antique roadshow to calm my dick down
Hey so summary of last night. I threw up in a rain boot then tipped it over on my bed, did my laundry and passed the fuck out. I feel like I didn't see you.
That's why they call him "the cheesegrater".
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
The highlight of my night was definitely explaining the bandaid on my nipple.
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
The to do list extremely baked self wrote for me last night says "1. Join gym 2. Passport? 3. Join a gym" And then just a drawing of a squid
I just shotgunned a beer and my lipstic didnt BUDGE. MERICUHH
She told him that she never wanted to see him again then took his takeout box of bacon cheddar fries and got in the uber saying "for feminism"
I lost all interest the day she banged that guy in the Amazon parking lot. That's a special kinda whore.
i just went to hell in the tanning bed. i think god is giving me a preview of what is in store if i keep getting drunk everyday.
Randomize
