I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
Nobody needs to come anywhere. Except on your face.
I'm pretty sure she sent a group text out saying that I was the one to get with her last night and sorry to everyone who didnt make it.
Honestly it was an honor just to be nominated.
Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
Any girl that compares her vag to a hot ham sandwich is beyond a slut
if he only knew that in between each sext i was puking.
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
Well the nurse forgot to take all my stitches out, so my surgical tools are peroxide, kitchen scissors, fingernail clippers, a pocket knife, and 11 beers. Let's do this...
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
May the one with the liver that just won't quit win
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
Drinking a bawls. If I'm dead when you get home, yes, they are poisoned.
He and his ex stood there talking about going to get Chinese food while I was half naked searching for my panties
And despite my lack of successful relationships I'm a fucking guru
That's like claiming you're a good coach but going 2-12 last season
Looks like the opera singer hook up is paying off. Ran into the MILF from 407 and she said “your lady friend sounded like a very lucky girl.”
Randomize
