Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
What do you mean you don't pregame your bikini waxes?
I think we need to stop being best friends, its not good for our vaginas.
There's never a time that i stay at this apartment that when i wake up in the morning and sit outside to smoke a cigarette that i don't feel ashamed of myself.
im sorry but you know it was a good night when you got tasered on the ass and didnt even feel it
I have vomit stuck in my nose, you should come with a warning label.
By the power invested in me, I now pronounce your taco to be meaty. Meaty taco meaty taco meaty meaty meaty taco.
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
At 27 it's no longer called 'slutty', it's called having a healthy sex life...
Karaoke machines out. We're taking turns farting into the microphone. Shits going south fast. Definitely be awake when you get home.
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
He's a loser but she says we just don't see the good stuff about him. It's like she's dating the Charlie Brown Christmas Tree.
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
There was a woman who drank mouth wash to get drunk during her supposed detox...this is def the internship for me!
I need you to get the emergency bail money out if the stuffed panda and go to the police station tot bail me out. I should be there in 20 minutes.
Randomize
