What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
bahahaha. this guy working at subway literally has someone's name tattooed on his arm, crossed out, and another name below it.
too bad you can't see the clap by looking at her face.
she is a standing ovation.
I popped a zit on your vagina. Don't say I never loved you.
Do you remember trying to eat gravel when we were walking back to the dorm?
You're not invited to the wedding. They don't want you starting a "who's fucked the bride the most" contest.
this is not the first time I've had hot dogs and 151 for thanksgiving.
Are taco bell cups microwave safe? I can't make that judgement right now
I just blew my weed a kiss
The bouncer was just about to kick Sarah out for getting with this guy 'too physically'. I told him that was 'her style' and he let them stay. Banter.
Dude, I puked in the stall for God knows how long. Halfway through, a kid sits down in the stall next to me and starts jacking off, i heard the porn on his phone and everything. so FYI, the middle stall is where good nights go to die
I woke up and there was a mans ass as my screensaver...
i'll talk to you in three hours when you've stopped foaming at the mouth and your eyes have rolled back into place
I have to make calls today at work. So I'm gonna call your phone and leave some random messages. Just delete them.
DUDE NEVER CALL THE COPS BACK
Randomize