My hair reeks of homosexuality.
It was like a spaceship landed and 1000s of hipsters filled up the park
how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
We lost the cork forthe wine, so we used a tampon as a replacement. I never loves tampons so much
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
Sorry about sucking tonight. Drunk truck fucking is apparently not my strong point.
hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking if you had a pulse
i can feel the knowledge leaking out of my brain
replace it with alcohol - nature abhors a vacuum
Someday, but I will be heavily drugged and there will be no dolphins.
I fucked a guy that's in Sports illustrated. I'm officially ready for college.
I'm pretty sure you and I ate the entire Keebler elf weed workshop
you just missed a great speech in which i almost coined the term "ass-ian" as in "my vaginal and ass-ian regions are no longer safe"
God please dont post that to facebook.
Aside from the possibility of pregnancy, I'm going to call last night a raging success.
Randomize